C09 General Principle

Which do you think is more likely?

You have to go with generalizations to be decisive in life.

OR

You will get more out of life the more you replace your generalizations with relevant specifics.

Anankelogy

The more you feel overwhelmed from multiple sources of stimuli, the more likely your cognitive load finds some way to simplify life. You reduce complicated details into manageable general ideas. You dismiss what seems less relevant to your immediate aims. You generalize.

To navigate life’s complexities, you likely adopt widely held views to help you comprehend what you cannot or do not have time to fully understand on your own. You generalize, in both senses of the word.

  1)  You apply your view as widely as possible; what fits you should universalize equally to others.

  2)  You evade messy details; you avoid bringing up details that could cost you social support.

Until you process all the relevant details of a need, to fully resolve that need, too much generalizing can lead you astray. Your body then warns you this need is not resolving enough to restore your functioning. You experience this warning as some form of physical or emotional pain.

To cope with the pain, you may revert back to comforting generalizations. You rely on what anankelogy calls relief-generalizing. That’s when you seek relief from the pain of your unmet needs with comforting generalizations. But relying too much on generalizing typically sidesteps the detail necessary to resolve the underlying need. So the pain inevitably recurs.

You then risk slipping into dysfunction, of prioritizing the relief of your mounting pain. You can then afford less and less cognitive space to focus on what is necessary to resolve the need, to remove that pain. You increasingly latch onto beliefs that limit your appreciation of reality.

All beliefs include some level of error. The more you cling to generalizing to cope, the less of reality you can faithfully process. Without some return to identifying and addressing the overlooked specifics shaping your needs, you risk slipping into a miserable rabbit hole of mounting despair.

Need-response

Need-response recognizes how legalistic and biopsychological responses to problems often fall short of addressing problems because they count on imperfect generalizations. You can find yourself pulled into generalizing by institutions built on such imperfect generalizations.

The more grounded in a universal principle—like honoring others as your healthiest self would have them honor you—the more reliable the generalization. The more a generalization permits you to skip or ignore relevant facts, the more trouble you are bound to face.

Some laws (like constitutional norms) are more grounded in universal principles than others. Most laws are kept intentionally vague to apply to as many situations as possible. And they tend to remain impersonal to avoid favoritism.

Biopsychological responses to problems rely heavily on generalizations from the medical model. It tries to reduces detail-rich situations into internally changeable options. The more this model overlooks the socioenvironmental factors to wellness, the more its generalizing can lead you down a path of unwellness in the name of wellness.

Need-response equips you to face the specifics of your needs and problems. The more of reality you realize, the less you habitually generalize.

Reactive Problem

Increasing alienation increases reliance on unreliable generalizations. Faulty assumptions fill in when not knowing other’s specific needs and experiences.

Problems arise. Instead of taking a high stand to identify and resolve needs, avoidant adversarialism sets in to indulgently take sides. Problems then feed on themselves. Instead of affirming other’s unchosen needs they cannot change, you provoke their defensiveness. They provoke yours.

You morally conflate what they could do to change with the natural needs they cannot change. They dig in their heels. What you reactively resist you reflexively reinforce. You then get more of what you ostensibly oppose, to ensure the conflict remains.

You could possibly normalize this tension. You might indulge in the conflict porn of constantly trying to win over others. You play a complicit role in impeding resolution of needs. You come to depend on the familiarity of the tense situation.

Responsive Solution

Need-response provide the free Personally Responsive tool to melt alienation with deliberate acts of kindness. You replace the habits of avoidance and adversarialism with engagement and mutual understanding and support.

To be better understood, you first understand others. To be more affirmed, you first affirm others. To receive appropriate support, you first appropriately support others.

The tool helps you break the ice so you can incentivize others to be open to your service to them. You model how they can improve to understand and engage your needs.

Along the way, you learn to let go of those fill-in assumptions. You drop your generalizations that no longer serve you. You gather more insight into all the dynamics shaping your life. You face more of reality and become a better person for it. The less you generalize, the more reality you finally realize.

Responding to your needs

How does this principle speak to your experience of needs? Post in our Engagement forum your thoughtful response to one of these:

• What counts as a generalization?

• How can I know when I have discovered enough specifics?

• I think too much concern about specifics can lead to overthinking some things.

• It doesn’t help being surrounded by others who constantly overgeneralize.

Instead of selecting one of these, post your own engagement feedback about your experience with the subject of this principle. Remember the aim is to improve our responsiveness to each other’s needs, toward their full resolution. If you’re new at posting here, first check the guide below.